“He’s former Army Special Forces, I come from a very conservative family (Amish, to be honest) with all that going on we had a lot of confusing dynamics.
He had PTSD, I had my own emotional demons. Entering into the gay world was exciting but overwhelming for both of us.
I wasn’t out yet, he was but wasn’t comfortable with being gay at the time. I never thought I could form romantic feelings for a guy, it’s only ever been sexual… but here this guy was, all fucking perfect and what not.
I knew of my feelings for him for years, I was crazy about him. I tried to get over him, dated other guys, hooked up, blind dates, I even dated a woman again…that’s how I desperate I got to get over him!
Friends and family would always tell me “move on” but I couldn’t. He captivated every part of me, within the first 15 minutes of meeting, I knew it was different. It was like we had been friends all of our lives.”